Some big changes at the top. Here we go:
1. Green Bay Packers
In a week of impressive wins for the top (4) teams, the Packers didn't need to rely on 5 opponent turnovers like the Broncos did. There offense is just having their way with every single team they play, and their defense has stepped up as well.
2. Denver Broncos
They broke away at the end with a 31-0 4th quarter, but this team just doesn't feel like the juggernaut it was at the beginning of the season. Still incredibly good though.
3. Cincinnati Bengals
The Bengals putting up that kind of win against one of the better defenses in the NFL is one of the best games that any team has played this season. Offensively and defensively, this team now feels like it's right in the superbowl mix.
4. San Francisco 49ers
Another great win, but it's all relative. Sure they jump the Seahawks, but dominating the Jags is just not on the level of what the Bengals did (although, again, pretty much nothing is). It's still impressive though. They've significantly narrowed the once-wide gap between them and the top of the league.
5. Seattle Seahawks
They slip, and they should. The performance on both lines was atrocious. This was a just a really bad game for the Seahawks, but luckily, they're getting healthy soon enough to combat the issues that killed them against the awful Rams. And there's a lot of variance in the NFL. One terrible game isn't cause to give up on a team that has otherwise proven itself to be one of the elite teams in the league, especially given the dearth of good teams to take their place in the top 5. According to my algorithm, only the Bengals, 49ers, and Seahawks boast both top 10 offenses and defenses.
6. Philadelphia Eagles
What was once extraordinary has turned to shit under a quarterback catastrophe. However, my algorithm weights earlier games the same as recent ones, and those were some amazing offensive performances. They need Vick to get healthy, and they need it fast. Luckily for them, they're still only a game out of first in the division.
7. New York Giants
They're making their move, and they're looking good. In the same fortunate divisional circumstances as the Eagles, this formerly 0-6 team could find itself right in the playoff mix pretty soon. The defense is actually really, really, really good.
8. San Diego Chargers
Bye. Or should I say, SEE-YA! ...to opposing defenses. Because Rivers is pretty unstoppable.
9. Houston Texans
They've had a lot of bad luck this season, but they really aren't such a bad team. The passing game needs work, but the Texans can run the ball with the best of them, and they still have the best player in the world, although it's closer now than it's been in a while (see #13).
10. New Orleans Saints
This team is pretty much the same as the Chargers. They can put up a lot of points by passing the ball a lot of times, and usually that can overcome a suspect defense.
11. Carolina Panthers
This is a team that has looked really good for a while now. They aren't spectacular enough at anything to warrant a top 10 ranking, but everything has been clicking against the weaker opponents they've played recently.
12. Cleveland Browns
For a completely defense-based team, the offense played pretty well against the Chiefs on Sunday to go along with the 6 sacks by the D. Just like most teams that have played the incredibly lucky Chiefs, the Browns easily played well enough to win.
13. Detroit Lions
Calvin Johnson. Calvin Johnson. WHAT??!!!?!??! He outgained the entire Cowboys' offense! By a lot! That was the best game any player has had all season, and he didn't have to throw for more touchdowns than any quarterback since the merger (see Denver Broncos, week 1). This one player makes an otherwise pretty awful team competitive.
14. Oakland Raiders
They're 3-4. They've been an average team all year. And still nobody has noticed that they're not the bottom feeders they were expected to be. They're about to be ranked TEN FUCKING SPOTS ABOVE AN EIGHT AND OH TEAM! The Raiders!
15. Chicago Bears
Their offense has been really good. Has been. Their defense has not. And without their starting quarterback, I'm not so sure they'll be able to keep up anymore. But they're 4-3, they had a well-timed bye week, and Jay Cutler should be coming back in a few weeks. Whether or not they can win a game in his absence? Still up in the air.
16. Arizona Cardinals
Beating up on a bad Falcons team! Good for them. The defense is really good.
17. New York Jets
That was really bad. REALLY BAD. They beat the Patriots one week, and then they lose by 40 the next. The high-variance-in-football-should-make-us-forgive-bad-games principle only applies to reasonably close games. This was not one of those. But hey, a team could do a lot worse than 17th (See #24).
18. Pittsburgh Steelers
It's the Steelers. What do we expect? hmmm... Oh right, exactly what we get. A mediocre-at-best offense and a fringe top-10 defense. That's why they're at 18, and the Raiders are at 14. They don't do anything remotely special.
19. Indianapolis Colts
Now that Luck has evened out for a lot of teams, I think we need to do a new ranking of the Luckiest teams in football. And the Colts fall in at #2. They don't pass the ball that well, they don't play defense that well, and the guy they traded a first round pick for doesn't run the ball well (Everybody else on the team, on the other hand, seems to run it pretty well). The NFL has enough parity that mediocre teams can win a lot without being that Lucky though. That's why they aren't the team that's had the most Luck. Or even close, for that matter. Their Luck doesn't Angerer me the way the Chief's Luck does. In other news, Colts players have fun names.
20. Washington Redskins
Just when it looked like they had finally turned the corner, the 4th quarter happened. And it happened hard. It's like they were just about to solve the Rubix Cube, and then BAM! We all know what happened next. Shit. Everywhere.
21. Tennessee Titans
Remember the Bills a few weeks ago? When they were just a mediocre offense and defense? Before things got a lot worse? That's the Titans now. Hopefully Locker can get them out of the pit. They have an easy stretch coming up in their schedule.
22. Minnesota Vikings
For all that their defense got killed, they played pretty well on the other side of the ball. And they were playing the best team in the league.
23. Baltimore Ravens
There's just nothing interesting to say about them during a bye.
24. Kansas City Chiefs
This is the luckiest team in the NFL. It's not like they're way worse than everybody else: They're not. The difference between the 24th best team and the 6th best team isn't that big (I chose 6th because there is a huge gap between 5th and 6th, almost as big as that between the Chiefs and Eagles. The difference between the Chiefs and the Seahawks IS really big). But they are worse than most other teams. And they have beaten every team they've played. That takes some fucking crazy luck. And it pisses me off.
25. Dallas Cowboys
The offense wasn't good, but it wasn't bad. Romo played pretty poorly, especially against a weak Lions defense. That happens though. But there are some things that don't happen. Like receivers getting 329 yards in an NFL game. I get that he's 6-5, 240 with a 6-10 wingspan, 43 inch vertical, and 4.35 40. I get that those physical tools are way better than anyone else he's going up against (or any other receiver [ever], for that matter). But 329 yards is too much. Way too much. And this isn't the first time the Cowboys defense has been torched this season.
26. New England Patriots
They're just not good. 100 yards passing, a much worse defense due to injuries, only winning against other awful teams. If Gronk can't save them, no one can. They're done. Although it's still looking like they'll win the division, somehow.
27. Buffalo Bills
More like Biffalo Bullshit, am I right? The AFC East is the worst division in football. The Bills are 1 spot away from being the second best team in it.
28. Miami Dolphins
Remember when they were 3-0 and they weren't that good? Now they're 3-4 and not that good.
29. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
They've supplanted the Browns for the title of worst offense in the NFL (surprisingly, the Jags have avoided it for a few weeks now). But the defense is average, so they could potentially hang in games, which they've done. Winning them is another question.
30. Atlanta Falcons
Firstly, this is the worst defense in the NFL. By a lot. Secondly, are they going to set a record for pass/run ratio this season? They've decided (smartly, I might add) that if they can't gain 2 yards per carry (which often happens), they might as well drop back to pass 65 times a game (which just happened). But with that defense, their receiving corps is just too injured to keep up.
31. St. Louis Rams
Out of the cellar! They put on a great performance against the Seahawks last night, but as I mentioned before, one game doesn't mean that much. This has been a really bad team the rest of the season.
32. Jacksonville Jaguars
Back where they (might) belong. The offensive resurgence led by Justin Blackmon didn't last long, and now it looks like they have to worry about 0-16 again. The defense is really bad, too, in case you were wondering.
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